Sunday, January 22, 2012
House 2: The Second Story
I remember reviewing House 2: The Second Story, but I can't FIND the review. And I feel like I should just keep moving through the House movies, despite the fact that even the internet seems to disregard the existence of a House 4, I mean it's available on IMDB but I can't seem to find a torrent or anything! If you've seen the movie, you'd realize there's a good reason for that, it was pretty terrible. BUT we're not talking House 4 we're talking House 2 my personal favorite installment in the series.
The movie starts off with a man and wife giving their child away, they're both obviously very paranoid and their house appears to be some sort of large castle type thingy. Apparently, many many generations of his family has lived their. Either way the son is sent off and they're killed by a cowboy zombie. flash forward to THE FUTURE, it's like 1986 probably. The child who was sent off in the opening scene is now in his 20's and moving back to the house where his parents died. Apparently he's some sort of famous artist and his girlfriend is some sort of talent scout for a major record label. They really don't comment on it to much but Jesse, the main character is on the cover of some magazine called "American Art." That night their friends show up and Jesse informs his friend Charlie about a crystal skull that may or may not have been buried with uncle who's name also happens to be Jesse. He also informs him about why his Uncle Jesse came to posses the crystal skull and about his partner who looks very similar to the cowboy zombie from the opening scenes!
So Jesse and Charlie decide to dig up Jesse's uncle. Well turns out he was a zombie, but NOT the same cowboy zombie from the opening scene. There's a few cowboy zombies in this movie please try to keep up. So it turns out the skull has granted uncle jesse some sort of eternal life, they never really describe it he says at one point he'll be rejuvenated but they don't explain it. At this point Charlie and Jesse realize they were throwing a halloween party! So uncle jesse, the cowboy zombie is able to freely move around the house and is apparently a big hit with the young ladies at the party! that is until they're attacked by a caveman! A Caveman who wants the crystal skull! So it turns out in one of the rooms upstairs there's a jungle now. Uncle Jesse explains how this house is somehow a beacon for the paranormal and so random rooms can turn in to portals back in time and other places etc etc etc. So now there's a jungle and Jesse and Charlie have to go into the jungle to get the crystal skull or Uncle jesse dies! At this point they acquire a pet Pterodactyl and a pet caterpillar dog hybrid who fucking RULES! Essentially this leads to a bunch of random people trying to grab the crystal skull and Charlie and Jesse need to go retrieve it. Ultimately, Jesse needs to face-off with Uncle Jesse's old partner who was the Cowboy zombie from the beginning. Did I mention at this part in the series every sequel had featured an actor from Cheers? This one had John Ratzenberger (Cliff)
Ok, so apart from a gross overuse of the name Jesse (because there are two frisking characters named JESSE) what are some things I liked about this movie, and disliked?
Likes - the puppetry, they're creative puppets the Caterpillar dog is a believable and fun puppet the Pterodactyl is also pretty cool. Costumes and locations, everything takes place inside the house (because it's called HOUSE see?) either way they did a really good job with the design of the house and the design of the random places they end up through portals. To ancient aztec temples, to the old west, you have a lot of diversity despite it only taking place in a house. The story is fun, not exactly Citizen Kane. It kinda reminds me of a "Treehouse of Horror" Episode of the Simpsons. Although the stories are interconnected it's a almost 3 stories in one using all the same characters.
Dislikes - Bill Maher is in it, he has a small part but you know he's the guy from "Politically incorrect with Bill Maher" I don't even know why I don't like this he just rubs me the wrong way. There's WAY to many characters that don't need to be there and there's even an entire story arc that goes absolutely nowhere( Charlie's GF's band, pretty much everything with the female characters that really don't need to be there in the first place) they're all just there to fill time. I would've liked to have seen more of John Ratzenberger's character who was an electrician/adventurer for hire who comes out of nowhere and disappears as quickly as he arrives leaving behind him a wake of awesome that no one could fill!
All in all it's NOT a masterpiece, it's hard to say it's "good" it's definitely not a high quality film. What it is, is a fun movie from the 80's If you've got some friends and you're looking for something that you can poke some fun at while having a good time, definitely this one. If you're looking for something that's not fun because you hate fun then don't watch this one, go watch something not fun this isn't for you.